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The Pulse Shooting Changes The Pride Parade's Course On Vanderpump Rules

The busiest, most fun day of the year becomes the saddest for Lisa and her SURvers.

It's a rough week for the SURvers as their annual pride-parade festivities are thrown off course in the wake of the Orlando, FL Pulse shooting -- the largest mass shooting in American history. It's a scattered episode that tries its hardest without quite coming together and, for better or for worse, everyone's reactions pretty much reflect that. I can't police the way people respond to tragedy, and expecting certain things from this, let's say, limited bunch is unfair, and just setting them and myself up for failure. It's not perfect, but I guess it'll have to do. And admittedly, a little goes a long way.

Everyone makes the best of it, so I'll try to keep business going as usual, too. To the rankings!

  1. Ariana
    It's great that Ariana wants to capitalize on the show's success by writing a cocktail book. Or it would be if the whole thing didn't feel like a retread of Sonja Morgan's toaster oven, which, weirdly, it does. Is her photo shoot or product launch as messy or as sad as Sonja's? Of course not, nothing is and nothing ever will be. But where that was dark and sad and funny in an "oh my god they're going to find this woman one day in $2.5m worth of jewels and half her face will have been eaten by feral cats" way, this is a different kind of dark.

    Sure, Tom's probably just feeling stupid for not thinking of doing a cocktail book first and desperately wants to glom on because he loves any kind of exposure. So in that obnoxious regard, kudos to her for doing it on her own terms and being firm in her resolve; there's nothing that says the couple that bartends together has to write a book about it together.

    However, the bristling conflict between them has her coming out looking worse for wear, what with the dead voice, obsidian eyes, and the way she tears into him at lunch, all the while maintaining a faux-smile and seemingly light air. It's shocking how quickly she morphs into James and starts in with how jealous and insecure he is. I mean, it's probably true, but WTF.

  2. Jax
    It's a quick aside, but Jax's "I'm not coming in today; make sure you wear a [Kevlar] vest, bro" text to Peter the morning of was really ill-timed. It'd be one thing if I thought he was legitimately afraid or upset, not just trying to cash in on a free day off, but I don't. No, this is another example of boys being boys making dumb jokes. And that's clear the second Brittany grabs him by the ear and drags him into work.
  3. James
    Sigh. A thankfully brief appearance that's business as usual.
  4. Lala
    Realistically, Lala could have worked. I'm not mad she stayed home and drank with a friend because she was freaked out. All in all, she actually explains her reasoning behind doing so really well. No, I'm mad she took the day off and didn't go buy underwear. Plus, what is this about how her boyfriend broke up with her? And we have to find out as an aside during a conversation with James? I don't accept it.
  5. Stassi
    Stassi's genuinely affected by the shooting, and it's quite moving when she breaks down at Tom and Katie's. (She doesn't even want a vodka soda!) Still, her and that backdoor pilot for Summer House of hers can fuck right off. Will I enjoy that trip when it finally comes around? Absolutely! I'm just not sure why so much of the episode had to be devoted to setting that storyline up when Pride, the episode's main focus, proved to be way more dramatic. (S/O for the dig she gives Lala when she shows up to SUR, though.)
  6. Katie and Scheana
    I couldn't really get a read on whether Katie was as disturbed as she said or just wanted the day off. But since I don't want to get into legislating how someone should or shouldn't grieve, I'm just going to leave it alone and move on. You know, like she should do with Lala. Which, speaking of, if we're going to have to keep hearing about Lala and her Range Rover, at least it's coming from Scheana, who's someone that can skirt that line between being a jerk and being funny. Someone has to do the heavy lifting now that Stassi isn't.
  7. Peter and Brittany
    I give these two a lot of credit for not letting the events of that day deter them from going into work. Yes, it's horrific and terrifying, but they understand how important visibility and support -- be it supporting the LGBTQ community, or their workplace during the busiest day of the year -- are.
  8. Tom Sandoval
    Whatever's going on with him and Ariana aside, Tom broke my heart this week -- in a good way. I'm probably going to get shit for saying this, but so be it. Tom's reaction to the Orlando tragedy was everything I wanted and needed from straight white people at the time and quite never got, so it was cathartic in a way that completely blindsided me and, frankly, saved the episode from being relatively emotionless. Yes, there was an outpouring of love at the time across social media, but seeing someone react so viscerally and break down is a wholly different experience.

    And his little speech to Lisa about being proud to know her because her strength inspires him to try harder and do better wrecked me in an "I would cry if I could cry" kind of way. I'm not a Sandoval fan by any stretch of the imagination, but I don't think I'll ever forget that. It's really one of the most genuine moments ever seen on the show. Maybe the most genuine moment.

  9. Lisa
    The show must go on. Thankfully, someone brave and classy is running point.
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