The Americans Crash The Party At Mr. And Mrs. Teacup's

Witness relocation is the least of Gennadi and Sofia's problems in our latest EPIC OLD-SCHOOL RECAP!

Previously -- way previously, like a season and a half ago -- Kimmy told "Jim" that her dad works for the CIA. All the other things that happened previously are from this season, so let's assume we all remember them and get right into the action, as Stan...strolls into a bakery and buys some starchy treats! TO THE EXTREME!!! I guess what sets Stan's errand apart from ones you or I might undertake is that we're not being followed by Soviet spies (that we know of) (I guess I don't know your life), whereas Stan is being tailed by Norm and Marilyn, the latter of whom watches from around a corner as Stan approaches a red brick house. He's admitted by an FBI agent and walks into the kitchen, all smiles, to hand off the box of baked goods to Sofia, but she's drawn and anxious and starts right in hectoring him: she doesn't know anything about Oklahoma, where the FBI is planning to relocate her, and when Stan tells her she'll be protected and safe, she doesn't care: "It's not good for my boy." She looks over her shoulder at Ilia as she says it, but like, we all assume this snit fit is less about him than it is about her "work friend" Bogdan, right? Stan takes a beat to stop himself reminding her that she did all this to herself -- and, by extension, to Ilia -- and smiles again as he assures her that kids adjust: "We're going to give you money, we're going to help you find a job." "And what about Gennadi?" she spits, trying to act nonchalant. "Are you going to send him to Oklahoma too?" Stan smirks a little as he asks if that's what she wants, and she looks down coyly before turning her Siberian husky eyes to Stan's and informing him, "Gennadi thinks you are his friend. His only friend in America." "I like Gennadi," says Stan, neither confirming nor denying Gennadi's label. "And Ilia talks about him a lot," Sofia adds, with a little shrug. "Maybe we go somewhere new. We both there, maybe it's right for Ilia." Stan tells her, "That's good to hear." Look who finally got a sugar cube into Mrs. Teacup!

At her apartment, Claudia reviews the photos Paige took in the last episode, identifying Nesterenko (though even though Claudia doesn't know that Kovtun already identified him to Elizabeth in Mexico, shouldn't she presume Elizabeth knows who he is because of his connection with Haskard and because they attended a party together?). The dark-haired American is David Morrison, who's highly placed in Sam Nunn's office. The white-haired guy is Edward De Bohun, "an officer in the CIA's Soviet division." So this looks bad for Nesterenko, who could, Claudia says, be the inside guy Breland has talked about; it could also be that Nesterenko doesn't know De Bohun is CIA. Elizabeth says she has a bad feeling. Making things worse: Claudia then asks when they should expect the next Breland tape, and Elizabeth has to tell her about Kimmy's Thanksgiving trip. Claudia seems kind of "whatever" about it, but Elizabeth says that with "the Mexico thing," she needs to know exactly what's happening in the U.S. Claudia laconically indicates that she should do what she has to do without asking any details that she hasn't already been read in on directly -- a pretty smart strategy that may be part of the reason she's still alive and spying in her sixties.

Elizabeth has just curtly reported, in response to Claudia's status check, that they're "still looking" for Gennadi when they hear the door as Paige lets herself in. (Notably, Paige hugs Claudia but not Elizabeth before she sits down.) On today's agenda? "The Great Patriotic War," which Elizabeth has to tell Paige is also known to some as World War II. "You probably think the Americans defeated the Nazis at Normandy," Claudia guesses. Since it's only 1987 at this point, Paige does not reply that she actually thought everything pretty much wrapped up after Dunkirk; thirty years later, she might. "Truth is the Germans began to lose the war at Stalingrad," says Claudia. "It was the Red Army that defeated almost all of Hitler's troops." She tests Paige, asking whether she knows how many Americans died in World War II; in fact, Paige doesn't. "Four hundred thousand," spits Claudia. "We lost 27 million." Everyone is sobered trying to fathom such a death count, so no one tell them that some think it might actually be 15 million more even than that. Claudia brings a book over to Paige and shows her a photo of ruins in Stalingrad, pointing to a building in the background of the shot and saying she was there: "My youngest brother was killed there. I lost most of my family. My parents. Three of my brothers." Claudia's voice breaks as she wraps up her list: "My two sisters."


Paige looks pained at the horrible accounting of Claudia's loss; Elizabeth's face is hard. She probably can't blame this death toll on the Americans, but if there's a way, I'm confident she'll find it.

After the credits, Stan carries a pizza up to another extremely anonymous building that, duh, contains the safe house where Gennadi is staying temporarily. Pizza is enjoyed. Beer bottles are drained. Hockey is broadcast and watched...by Gennadi, while a nap is taken by Stan. I don't know how Stan defines friendship, but I certainly only do that in front of people I truly cherish.

Elizabeth is driving Paige home after their visit to Claudia's, and saying that when Paige had a World War II module in ninth grade, Elizabeth would (furiously) read her textbooks: "They barely mention the Soviet Union. I wanted to tear that bullshit they were teaching you right out of your head and shove the truth right in there." What a beautiful and evocative metaphor of pedagogy! Elizabeth parks and continues describing the truth she wished she could have conveyed to Paige: "Just about what really happened. How we suffered. How we died. How we won!" Paige doesn't really know how to respond to...any of that, so she changes the subject to that Brian kid, the Congressional intern, and that she did end up talking to him at his brother's birthday party: "He said a few things about the new Defense department budget. His Congressman's working on it." Slightly breathless with the excitement we all feel when we've been sitting on some hot goss for too long, Paige asks, "Do you want to know what he said?" "I thought you weren't going to go to that party," Elizabeth frowns. "I didn't say that," Paige replies. Elizabeth, trying to be casual, says Paige shouldn't talk to Brian about that stuff. Paige says he brings it up, and if you've ever known a white man who has a job that either actually is important, or even just that he thinks is: you know it's true. "What am I supposed to do, not listen?" Paige whines. Elizabeth tells her to change the subject: "Act like you're not interested." Elizabeth, are you crazy, that just makes them talk about it more. Anyway, Elizabeth says that's how it has to be if Paige wants to date Brian: "You can control the conversation. And if you can't, don't have the conversation." Paige starts getting pissy that Elizabeth isn't here for her Defense department leaks: "You wouldn't believe what these interns have access to. He's walking around with classified documents!" Uhhhhhhh that may have just been something he said because he thought it would make you want to fuck him and if so PS we all know it worked. "He said he could show them to me if I met him for lunch," Paige adds. So what we know for sure is that Brian has "access" to a rubber stamp that says "Classified," or maybe just knows where to buy one. "Sounds like you made quite an impression," says Elizabeth drily. "What's that supposed to mean?" snaps Paige. I love when they get mother-daughterly, because: I have had this conversation with my mom 5000 times; every daughter is Lady Bird and every mom is Mrs. Bird. "It means I don't want you to do this," says Elizabeth, getting testy. "Jesus, Mom, I'm not doing anything," Paige spits. Elizabeth says it sounds like she is. Paige gives her a long glare and then gets out of the car without another word. (Note: unlike Lady Bird's, this car is not moving.)

Sometime later, Stan determines that he's put in enough time at Gennadi's and excuses himself -- and Elizabeth's team is in place as he comes out and nods at an agent posted, rather conspicuously, right where the sidewalk meets the walkway up to the front door of the building. Marilyn watches Stan get into his car and turn up an adjacent street; Norm dips his head and watches in his rearview mirror as Marilyn follows Stan in her car.

Elizabeth comes into the bedroom in a clingy black turtleneck dress, big earrings, and heels -- pretty much the most glam she's looked all season when she hasn't been in disguise. Philip is looking at guess what more paperwork, and since he's sitting on her side of the bed (weird), he offers to move if she's going to sleep. Throatily, she tells him she can't sleep yet, and starts getting undressed as she sits on the end of the bed to say that they told Paige about the war. "What'd she say?" asks Philip, looking grave. "I think she got it," says Elizabeth. She hands him her earrings to put on her nightstand and politely asks whether he's making any progress with the bills. "Trying," he mutters. "A lot more to do tonight?" she asks.


Matthew Rhys does an amazing silent job of cycling through expressions that say "I remember when that used to mean she wanted to fuck" and then "I should just stop with the bills for tonight, who even cares" and then "Wait, DOES she want to fuck?"


Elizabeth looks into his eyes with an expression that's frank and vulnerable all at once, and then reaches out to touch his cheek, sliding her hand down to hold his. It's actually very sweet as they slowly move toward each other in a way that lets us know -- if their coldness and bickering hadn't already -- that it's been a while since they've both had any kind of tender feelings for each other at the same time, and they start making out right there on all of Philip's accusatory invoices. When Elizabeth lies down, with Philip on top of her, her butt makes the calculator start freaking out beeping, and they are both amused by this encroachment on the MOOD before getting back to business. In conclusion: aw.

The next day, Elizabeth is out back smoking and looking melancholy when a giddy Philip emerges through the back door. To his question, she says she didn't sleep great. He says he did, for the "first time in a while," and she's like, "I wonder why," and they have another nice moment of liking each other that I think we're all pretty sure won't last past breakfast.

Elizabeth hurries inside after Philip and accepts a cup of coffee he's poured her before announcing that "things aren't going well with the summit." Philip, trying not to look too interested, asks how. She tells him about Nesterenko's secret meetings, and Philip obviously knows how bad that is. "We've got to find out what he's saying," says Elizabeth regretfully. "I think there might be a way? But I'd need your help." Aaaaaaand the story behind the sexy sweater dress starts to emerge. Also "past breakfast" was a wildly optimistic estimate. Philip blinks, waiting for Elizabeth to explain, and after a long sigh, she gets to it: "You'd have to meet Kimmy in Greece. You'd bring her over to Bulgaria. We would pick her up with drugs, and hold her. I'd go to Breland, say 'We have your daughter, do you want her to spend twenty years in a Bulgarian prison, or tell me what I need to know.'"


Philip winces before fixing Elizabeth with a hateful glare: "There has to be another way." He sits at the table and she follows, saying that Breland is all they've got; everything she's been working on comes down to this. Philip looks sadly at his hands. "All you'd have to do is go on a trip," Elizabeth concludes, and they both kind of quietly snort at the idea that it's not more complicated than that, Elizabeth essentially admitting that she's full of shit with an "I know. I'm sorry. It's just-- It's too important." "She's just a kid," says Philip, finally. "Not anymore," says Elizabeth. HMMM IT'S ALMOST LIKE THOSE STATEMENTS COULD APPLY TO SOMEONE ELSE THEY KNOW. "He'll tell you anything to get his daughter back," says Philip. Elizabeth says they'll give him "a lie detector test" and not "a polygraph," so I guess she's an idiot, although honestly anyone who puts any stock in results of those tests is probably a bit of an idiot regardless of what they call it. "You don't think he can beat that?" asks Philip -- like: exactly. "He won't risk it," says Elizabeth, though it seems like she's starting to doubt this plan herself. "And what if he says no, what then?" Philip asks. "She rots in a Bulgarian prison?" "That won't happen," says Elizabeth wearily. "Breland will cave. She'll be there less than twenty-four hours. And then, that's it. You're done -- with Breland, done with her, done with all of it. For good."


Philip looks at her like he wishes he could believe that, but definitely does not. Elizabeth studies him for a moment before saying, "Philip, I haven't asked for much. Anything, really. But I need this one." Philip blinks morosely, knowing he's going to do it and hating himself.

And then we're at a bar full of young people and a live band and a kitschy pinball table! Paige is out with a couple of female friends when she gets cruised by a guy in a plaid shirt, and I won't say he looks EXACTLY like if you gave Brian an earring and prevented him from shaving for a couple of days, but I will say Paige has got a type. His move is to say that if she gets 100,000 points in the pinball game she's currently playing, he'll buy them all drinks -- and, when his interruption fucks her up and she loses (UNFORGIVABLE, THIS GUY IS ABSOLUTELY NOT MY TYPE), to offer to buy them drinks anyway. She orders a gin and tonic before her friends say they have to get back and start studying; Paige tells them she's fine. This guy seems real basic so let's hope she's just entertaining the idea of flirting with him to keep her spy skills sharp.

And then Gennadi is walking, unattended, to a convenience store as Elizabeth watches from across the street in a wig that very well might be on sideways.


As Gennadi goes inside, Elizabeth crosses the street and goes up a flight of stairs between buildings that Gennadi's just come from.

Meanwhile, "Jim" and Kimmy have just enjoyed a Lebanese dinner because what do you know, Jim just happened to have a reason to visit Kimmy's college town! Back then he could have still been doing business with Borders, but it's a lot more fun to pretend he's in town to hit up Zingerman's because he's told Kimmy he's a pickle broker. He says they should do this more often, and she says he should come to Ann Arbor for business more often, and he's like ABOUT THAT, and tells her it just so happens that he's going to be in Rome when she's in Greece and he could totally pop over and see her!


Kimmy is silent for a good six seconds, forcing Philip to answer himself: "Or not." Kimmy giggles a little, relieved that he broke the tension and saved her from having to do it, and politely puts him off: it's not that she wouldn't want to see him, but she's going with all her friends, and they've scheduled all these tours, and blah blah blah. Philip quickly says he totally gets it, and when Kimmy asks if she'll see him when she comes back home, he assures her that she will. They've arrived at his car, and when he opens the door to let her in first, he takes his time walking around to the driver's side and deciding how best to pivot.

Gennadi comes out of the store and is going back up the stairs when Elizabeth and her terrible wig stop him so she can ask him for a light. He's barely started patting down his coat for a lighter when one of his agents appears at the foot of the stairs to yell at him for going out on his own while the agent was peeing, so Elizabeth doesn't get to pull a Hanley on Gennadi, instead accepting the offered light and hurrying off.

At the bar, Paige is flirting with the pinball guy, whose name is Vince, as he tells her the story of a skydiving trip during which he got pushed out of a plane before he was ready. He's clearly wrapping things up by segueing from the comedy of the moment to how beautiful the landscape was as he drifted down when his buddy Tony appears behind him and sets a couple of shots down on the table before sitting down in a chair behind him. "It must have been amazing to see the world like that," says Paige, obligingly taking her cue but also seeming interested. The two are gazing into each other's eyes when Tony decides to salt Vince's game: "You said it was like getting jerked off for the first time." "Shut the hell up, man," snaps Vince. "You know, like you're scared," Tony continues, "'cause you don't know what to expect, and then you just--" And then Tony does his impression of ejaculating and laughs at himself. "It's like getting yanked by a beautiful girl for the first time," he concludes, generously indicating Paige. She's like, "OKAY. WELL." Vince tries to keep it light, telling her not to listen to Tony: "He don't got the advantage of learning good manners at a place like Georgetown." "I go to George Washington," says Paige tightly. Vince hisses a "shit," but hold up, both of those AND George Mason are all in the greater D.C. area? Give Vince a break: that is way too many schools named after Georges. Paige starts putting on her coat, Tony already heckling her, and Vince jumps in to tell her to ignore Tony, who's drunk: "Apologize, Tony." Tony leans forward and drawls, "You're not even that hot anyways." Paige bitterly laughs. Tony tells Vince there's "plenty of other ass in here," and Paige is like, "Okay!" She advises Vince, "If you ever want to get laid again, get a better wingman," and as she's heading for the door, Tony -- who is about a head and a half taller than she is -- stands up to block her path and demand that she repeat what she said. She ignores him, but he grabs her by the wrist: "What did you say, bitch?" That activates Paige, who swings back around and punches Tony with the hand he's not holding. He punches her back, hitting her face, but is not prepared for her to continue attacking him with punch after punch at his stomach; when she finishes with a knee to his balls, he drops, and she goes on her way, calling him a piece of shit (fair). Vince goes after her, trying to find out if she's okay, but in the process makes the mistake of trying to delay her with a hand on her shoulder, at which she whips around AGAIN and punches him square in the nose. And THAT was the night the lights went out in George...town? TOO MANY GEORGES, FOR REAL.

Philip pulls up in front of Kimmy's house -- thanking her, as he parks, for introducing him to fattoush (as he should, it is delicious). She's already clicked open the door handle when he stops her to tell her, "I'm proud of you." She smiles, looking slightly weirded out but mostly pleased, and given what he knows about her problems relating to her dad, it's not a bad move. "You've grown into a smart, interesting woman." He self-deprecatingly jokes about whether that's a really corny thing to say, and she fondly tells him, "Only a little." "Truth is, I'm a little intimidated by you," Philip adds. The other piece of Kimmy's backstory is that she always wanted to fuck "Jim" and he wouldn't, so given that now she seems like she has grown out of those old feelings, THIS IS VERY, VERY STRONG WORK ON PHILIP'S PART. Kimmy loves it as he explains, "Soon you'll get bored and you'll never talk to me again." "I still talk to you, don't I?" she points out. "Even though I stopped smoking weed, like, two years ago....We're friends, Jim. Always. And I'll come home Christmas break." Philip accepts that, adding that if she changes her mind about Greece, his offer stands. She smiles. He stares at her long enough to make her ask, "What?" He continues staring juuuuust a bit longer, and then goes in for a kiss, their leather jackets creaking against each other.


Kimmy looks shocked by this development, and Philip takes a measured beat before asking if that was out of line. Her eyes are filling as she says it wasn't: "I liked it." She swallows hard and then leans in to kiss him, and seconds later we cut to them in Kimmy's college bedroom, where Kimmy's getting perfunctorily railed in the missionary position but seeming pretty into it regardless.


Philip, however, hates himself.

Chez Beeman, the lady and gentleman are heading out for the day. Before Renee gets into her car, Stan stops her to say he'd had a thought: there are lots of jobs at the FBI other than agent -- jobs that don't have any age restrictions. She could come work in HR! Renee notes that she'd probably have to take a pay cut BUT WHAT IS MONEY WHEN YOU'RE WORKING ON BEHALF OF MOTHER RUSSIA -- if she even is, WHAT IS HER DEAL ALREADY.

Elizabeth is sketching as Erica, from her hospital bed, watches over her shoulder and scolds her about looking at the drawing instead of the object -- in this case, a vase shaped like a little pitcher. That Erica is managing to boss Elizabeth around while also suffering enough to alter her breathing and periodically groaning in pain is really a testament to her dedication as an educator. When Elizabeth rises to try to help her, Erica orders her to sit back down and show her the other drawings she's done; Elizabeth hands over the sketchbook and Erica crabs, "Is this it?" "I don't have much free time," says Elizabeth quietly. "Kind of a funny phrase," snips Erica. "Is that what you'd call this? 'Free time'? There should be dozens of drawings in here." Erica starts at another pain; Elizabeth jumps up to offer her morphine, but that's not what Erica wants: "I want you to do your goddamn homework!" Elizabeth silently takes back the sketchbook and sits with her back to Erica as her patient rants on: "You gotta try. You gotta try! There's someone in there who knows how to see. But you have to put in the time. That's what time is for."


Elizabeth turns at this and sees Erica, looking wild-eyed, and feels the weight of Erica's expectations for her even as it's also clear Erica knows how futile all of this is. "No one understands," says Erica. "No one understands that." She starts shuddering into a cough, but holds Elizabeth off with a warning hand before Elizabeth's even all the way out of her chair. "Look at the vase," Erica directs her. "Draw. Don't think. Just draw." Elizabeth sighs, and does it. Erica settles back, and once Elizabeth has seen that Erica's eyes are closed, she allows herself a minor eye-roll. This vase better be pretty fucking great.

And then Oleg is leaving his class at George Mason when he happens to run into...Tatiana! His #problematic girlfriend from Season 5!


It's pretty clear from Tatiana's expression that this isn't going to be a reunion tour, but Oleg tries with the pleasantries, saying he wondered if she was still there. She heard he was in town, she says, and had to see for herself. He brings up his departure -- "My parents" -- but she cuts him off, saying she knows why he left. To her question, he says it's work that has brought him back, but she tightly comments that there are engineering schools back home. He changes the subject to her, asking if she's still at the Rezidentura; she's actually still in the same job, all these years later. "It would help me a lot if you could just tell me why you're here," she blurts, and he pretends to be amused that she doesn't believe him. Tatiana hasn't got time for this: "Please. Hard things happened between us." Uh, I'll say. OHHHHHH! Anyway, she thinks he knows she's an honest person: he can tell her the truth; she won't hurt him. He insists that he is telling her the truth, and that he's an honest person too, and that's when she's had enough, and quietly tells him, "I know it was you. You told the Americans about my operation." She told her bosses she thought it was him: "But you got out of it, didn't you? Your father?" Oleg puts on a show of being affronted: this is crazy! He got interrogated! He could have been killed! "But here you are," she snaps. She was so stupid to trust him, she says, but he did teach her something: "That will never happen to me again." Oleg insists that he didn't betray her, and she reminds him that she was about to get promoted to rezident; instead, because of him, she's moldering in the same old job. At her sarcastic response to his nahpology that he's sorry things haven't worked out the way she wanted, he agrees that being sorry is useless: "The only thing that's done any good for me is moving on." She bitterly says it's nice that he did, but maybe once in a while he should look behind him and think about everything he destroyed on the way -- and with that, she takes off. Wait, without exchanging contact info, how are they ever going to get together and have a drink for old times' sake???

And then Elizabeth is coming home to find Philip back from his trip and unpacking in the bedroom. "How'd it go?" she asks. "Fine," he huffs, not looking at her. She wisely stays back, leaning in the doorway, as she asks, "Is it on?" "Yep," he grits. "Good," she says. They hear a vehicle approaching outside; Philip looks out and asks Elizabeth if she was expecting Paige, I guess because now that a third person is going to be within observation range, they need to dial down the aggression with each other...or at least consider trying to. Anyway, Paige's arrival is a surprise to Elizabeth as well, and she comes down to ask what she's doing there. "Can we spar?" asks Paige.


Elizabeth clearly clocks Paige's busted eyebrow but doesn't acknowledge it aloud -- she just says yes, they can spar; Elizabeth will change and meet her in the garage. Philip gives Elizabeth a look, but doesn't intervene.

At the Rezidentura, Tatiana's boss Semyon pours her tea and gets her recap (leave it to the professionals) of her meeting with Oleg. He's irritated that they have nothing to report to Moscow, since Oleg didn't admit anything and even Tatiana grants that there's a chance he really is just there to study. She says Moscow needs to help them figure out what's happening, like by putting pressure on Igor, and Semyon mutters, "They should get rid of his father and everyone like him." Tatiana, smiling creepily, summarizes the situation: "Oleg's not here for the GRU [that's KGB for us non-Russians]. He's not here for us. And he's not loyal. Send that cable." Add a gif, too -- those are fun.

Philip is standing unobtrusively off to the side of the garage to watch while Paige and Elizabeth spar. Elizabeth gets in a good kick at Paige's side, and Paige bends over to catch her breath before going to get a sip of water. "What's going on?" Elizabeth finally asks. Paige tries to get out of it before admitting that "these two assholes started a fight" with her. Elizabeth gets closer to demand more details, and Philip also emerges to get a better look as Paige tells Elizabeth as little as possible. Elizabeth wants to know if Paige could have just left, and Paige says she was leaving: they were drunk, and one put his hand on her. Paige continues defending her decisions, forcing Elizabeth to spell out that Paige is not supposed to be doing anything to draw attention to herself anywhere; Paige can't go back there. Paige says she won't. Elizabeth is like, "EVER," and Paige snaps, "That's what I just said!" Elizabeth rants on, trying to drill into Paige what an unnecessary risk she took, and Paige yells at her to knock it off: she gets it. "Good," says Elizabeth, but Paige isn't done: "You need to get off my ass sometimes. You're not my boss every second, every day. You don't tell me who I should and shouldn't sleep with!" At this, Philip interjects himself to interject, "WHAT?!" Paige and Elizabeth both ignore him (hee hee), Paige snipping that if she likes a guy, she'll do whatever she wants. "If you like them, FINE," barks Elizabeth. "Why would I sleep with them if I didn't like them?" asks Paige. ...Philip, you want to field this one?

Paige stomps out the garage door and Elizabeth stalks back into the house, Philip on her heels demanding to know what that was. "I don't want a big talk right now," crabs Elizabeth. Philip, misapprehending the situation, asks whom Elizabeth was telling Paige to sleep with, and she curtly tells him it was the opposite. Philip still wants to know who, and Elizabeth says it's none of his business, before relenting: "Some guy. Brother of a kid from school. A Congressional intern. She says she likes him, but she's gotten a little bit of information from him. Nothing, really." "Well, that's just great," snits Philip. Elizabeth chalks it up to Paige just being boy-crazy, like any other girl her age, but admits that maybe Philip was right, and Paige isn't cut out for this work. Philip corrects her: "She can do it; my point was always that she shouldn't." Elizabeth doesn't bother trying to engage this, grabbing a coat and saying she has to go. "Where?" snaps Philip. "To work," says Elizabeth. Bro, where do you think Elizabeth Jennings is going in SWEATS? Because it's not Nordstrom. Philip, impotently, watches her leave. Cucked by the trade.

Bewigged, Elizabeth watches Gennadi's building, and scans the surrounding area. When she sees an opportunity, she heads for those stairs, lets herself into a courtyard, moves a trash can over to the wall, and steps on it to launch her as she climbs up the fire escape and through Gennadi's kitchen window. Honestly shocked the FBI put him up in a place without a single bar on any of the windows, but fine. Elizabeth listens for sounds outside the room: we can hear the faint din of a TV, and then Sofia saying, in Russian, "I'm getting juice. Then it's time for bed." "I'll sleep on the couch," says Gennadi (also in Russian, duh). "I'm just glad you came." Elizabeth slips to the far side of the fridge and remains undetected as Sofia opens it to pour a glass of orange juice and take off again. Then Elizabeth slides behind the kitchen door as Gennadi comes in to ditch his beer bottle and get a glass of water. He hears something and turns, which is when Elizabeth darts out and stabs him -- first in the neck, straight on (more or less; she's a lot shorter than he is), and then under his chin and up through the roof of his mouth. Gennadi has just collapsed onto the floor when Sofia comes in to investigate. She groks the situation pretty quickly and runs, but Elizabeth is on top of her right away, stopping her by stabbing her in the back; when Sofia falls, and starts trying to crawl away, Elizabeth straddles her and pulls up her head to slash her throat from behind. As Sofia's feet are still twitching, Elizabeth hears a marching band flourish from the TV and looks up: it's the old Babes In Toyland, and Ilia is parked in front of it; it's clear from the way the stuffed monkey in his lap slightly droops while she watches that Ilia's asleep. Elizabeth takes a long moment to consider what her least terrible option is, and then she very carefully, very quietly pulls herself up and off Sofia; stands in the hallway a moment; and slips away, back the way she came. Trauma from seeing your parents murdered is less bad than getting killed yourself before middle school, I guess.

And then we're in Paige's apartment, as she goes to answer a knock on the door: it's Philip. From both their manners, it seems like this isn't a place he visits much.


Paige is so stunned to see him on her doorstep, in fact, that she doesn't invite him to enter and he has to ask her if he may. She silently stands aside and he walks in, asking if Gwen (presumably her roommate) is there; she is not. Philip looks around, smiling a little as he takes in the unfamiliar decor, and declines her offer of refreshment. He tries to keep his voice light as he says, "I remember that feeling. Of being able to do that to people." "I've never hit anyone before," says Paige, sounding a little proud of herself. "Except Mom, in practice." Philip asks how it was, and Paige doesn't know how to answer: "I don't think I'm the same as you, Dad."


Philip does not care for this response, and asks what she means. "I know you're not into what me and Mom do," she says haltingly. "But I am."


Philip gives her another look of silent sarcasm, and honestly, just as anyone who's ever had a mom can relate to that conversation in the car about which boys Paige should date, anyone who's ever had a dad can relate to the simmering seething that precedes a scary blow-up. At first, it had seemed like Philip came over to talk to Paige about the healthiest ways to use her new skills, but then this read of his skills has redirected him -- so he pretends to accept Paige's assessment and remains calm and steady as he tells her, "Come at me." "...What?" she replies. A hard edge coming into his voice, Philip says, "I want to see what you learned." Paige can't believe he's serious: "We don't have pads or anything." Philip gets bitchy: "Oh, there aren't really pads in the real world." Paige checks if he wants her to pretend-hit him, but he tells her, "I want you to come at me, and hit me, and I'll be okay." Poor, dumb Paige puts her hands up and takes a couple of swipes, but Philip easily smacks her and sends her backward, telling her, "Really come at me." Paige starts to detect that this is going to be bad for her, but she tries again anyway; in her second attempt, he picks her up bodily and swings her around so she kicks a lamp off a table. "Please," hisses Philip. Paige's third attack ends with her in a headlock she can't get out of; when Philip releases her, she takes a break with her hands on her thighs, like when she was sparring with Elizabeth, but then remembers that this isn't that. "Try again," says Philip condescendingly, and she does; this time, he holds her longer in a headlock before slamming her against a wall. Unable to extricate herself, Paige clamps down with her teeth on the crook of Philip's elbow, and for the benefit of...no one else in the room, he does a hilarious silent "Seriously with this shit" take over his shoulder before freeing his arm and throwing her against the wall again. He pulls her away, still holding her firmly in a headlock, and as she struggles, it's hard to tell from her face whether she's more fighting for breath or just humiliated. Philip lets her go, tossing her at the wall one last time. There's no effort evident on his face, and he manages to exhale a "not bad" at her before putting his coat back on, leaving Paige to regret having ever suggested that her father might be a low-T beta male.

And, alone, Philip walks down the hallway to the elevator, and hates himself.

And then Stan's rolling up at what was, until quite recently, Gennadi's apartment building. The surrounding area is crawling with first responders, who let Stan through when he flashes his badge; he ends up at the front door just as a social worker is leading out Ilia, hair sweaty, face streaked with tears, still clutching his stuffy. Stan watches him go, heartsick. GUESS WHAT, GUYS, I DON'T HAVE A JOKE ABOUT THIS ONE.


Sometime later, Paige and her stunningly unflattering jeans show up at Claudia's. She collects herself in the hallway for a moment before letting herself in and asking Elizabeth and Claudia what they're doing today. "This first," says Claudia, taking a bottle of olive oil out of the cupboard. "Seriously?" asks Paige, as Claudia fills three shot glasses. "Always, before you go out drinking," says Claudia. "To coat your stomach." "So you don't get sick," adds Elizabeth. "And you'll get less drunk. You need to be less drunk than they are. Do you understand?" "You need to think clearly," says Paige. The three down their olive oil shots, Paige grimacing before asking, "How much can you drink with this?" "Let's find out," says Claudia, getting vodka out of the freezer and pouring three shots -- in three other glasses, because Claudia is not an animal, CLAUDIA IS A G!

Less of a G? Philip, who's (once again) eating chips and looking at paperwork when he hears a knock at the door: it's Stan! They both joke about Stan coming over to drink Philip's beer as a throwback to the pre-Renee era, Philip then quickly making sure everything's okay with her. It is; Stan's just worn out with "work stuff." He says it's an old case from when he "was working against the Russians"; Philip makes himself sound bored listening and barely reacts as Stan says two people got killed: "Our job was to protect them. We're supposed to be relocating them here. Promised we'd keep them safe. Now they're killed. In front of their own kid -- can you believe that?" Philip still has his back to Stan, so he can flinch in true horror at the turn the story has taken. "Seven years old," Stan continues. "Finds his mom and dad covered in blood." Stan notices that Philip's still looking away and asks if he's okay. Philip quickly tries to recover, saying it just sounds awful. Stan agrees that it is: "I was just watching the hockey game with this guy." Philip takes a pull of his beer and wishes himself into someone else's life.

Sometime later, more drinks have been downed at Claudia's, and they're on to talking about sex. Claudia is saying she'd only had sex with one man -- her husband -- and then he was killed at the start of the war, and Claudia's next partner was a Red Army soldier: "He promised me half his rations." Paige cracks up at the thought of having sex with someone for food, and Claudia has to remind her, "I WAS STARVING." "We ate rats," says Elizabeth. Paige turns to her and, blowing past the admission of rodentophagy, asks how old she was when she started having sex. Elizabeth will only admit to being younger than Paige was. Paige keeps pressing her for an answer; Elizabeth, her cheeks already very flushed from the booze, says there was a boy...and then trails off laughing at the memory. Paige prods her again, and Elizabeth says her first time wasn't really her first time. She and her mother were living in an apartment with a bunch of other families; there was never any privacy. The boy was so scared that someone would walk in on them that he didn't take Elizabeth's underwear all the way off: "So he thought he was doing something, but really, he was just driving into that space between me and the couch." Everyone dies laughing at the poor boy who probably thought he became a man that day, before Claudia toasts: "To the boy!"

Kimmy's working at her desk when "Jim" calls. She chirpily asks if he's all packed, and we cut to Philip in a phone booth, working his way toward getting to the point, like he did in his phone call with Henry a couple of episodes back. He asks if she remembers telling him he's stuck, and since it was only a couple of weeks ago even in show time, she does. She starts to explain that she was just talking, but he stops her, and says she was right: "I am. I can't meet you in Greece, Kimmy." Kimmy is dismayed and asks what happened. "It's not-- It's not one thing. It's just-- I-- I-- I can't do it." "Do what?" she asks. "You and me, our, our, our friendship. You-- You need-- You need someone your own age." Kimmy soulfully says she doesn't care about that. Philip says he really cares about her, so he can't keep doing "this -- not as friends, not as anything." Kimmy looks shattered as she says she doesn't understand where this is coming from. Philip tells her to listen to him: "It's important that you hear me. You're going to be okay." Kimmy says she is okay, and Philip says he knows; he has to move on. "Something's wrong with you," mumbles Kimmy. Philip says he knows: "I'm trying my best." Kimmy sits in silence for a moment before Philip tells her one last thing: "When, um-- When you're in Greece, if, if, if, um-- If somebody tries to get you to go to a Communist country with them, don't. Okay? Don't go." Obviously, Kimmy is like, "...What?" "Go to Greece," says Philip. "Stay in Greece, and then come home. You hear me? Goodbye, Kimmy." He hangs up, and slowly exhales, confident that he's balanced the scales by saving one co-ed's life after ruining another's. I hope Kimmy Goes To Her Happy Place and not Bulgaria! I mean, honestly, how hard would it even BE to get someone to trade Greece for 1987 Bulgaria? You guys, I really hope we don't find out.

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