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The Kelly Song vs. Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

It's Woody's creative declaration of love vs. tidbits of wisdom on SNL!

71 votes

The Kelly Song

312 votes

Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

The case for The Kelly Song

Woody was a simple man. He tended bar, he didn't have high ambitions and he loved his fiancee Kelly. So much so that he wrote her a song as simple as he was. Just admit know you still sing this to yourself every time you meet someone named Kelly. Maybe even out loud. — Nutjob

The case for Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

Peaceful music, a soothing background image, an introduction from Phil Hartman, and then a snippet of something surreal and brilliant from Jack Handey. One of the best parts of SNL in the 90's.

"If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason."

"Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someone's neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing?!"

"Dad always said laughter was the best medicine. I guess that's why so many of us died of tuberculosis."

"The crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw."

"Some folks say it was a miracle. Saint Francis suddenly appeared and knocked the next pitch clean over the fence. But I think it was just a lucky swing." — generate789

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