Photo: Timothy Kuratek / CBS

Survivor Is Among The Week's Reality Returns, While BBC Lets Its Stars Return To Their Real Accents

Wave hello to the castaways and goodbye to the Big Brother houseguests in Lunch And A Show!

As wall-to-wall premiere week rages on, CBS brings back not just Survivor, but a whole passel of former Survivor contestants taking their second bites at the million-dollar apple...or something. Also returning? Our Jessica Liese, who'll once again be covering the season for us. A gem from her post on the premiere:

Jeff Varner, who likens the new-school game to a speeding freight train, is all too happy to hitch a ride. That's the short version, anyway; in reality, Varner dispenses a series of train metaphors that gradually increase in complexity over what feels like about five minutes of confessional time, interrupted briefly as he attempts to identify something that has bitten him on the ass.

Jessica will also be covering The Amazing Race when it returns tomorrow night; here's a new sneak peek from the episode to get you psyched.

As fans of CBS's reality franchises know quite well, sunrise on Survivor and The Amazing Race means sunset on Big Brother. Summer's over, guys, and so is our time with this latest crop of idiots. Jeff Alexander wished them a fond farewell in his post on the season finale, though we all know this is just a "see you later" until one or more of them gets recruited for...Survivor or The Amazing Race.

Finally, once you've finished rubbing your hands together at all the schadenfreude in the Survivor premiere, you can say a fond "welcome back" to some of your favourite British actors' real British accents. BBC One has released a new supertease for its fall/winter offerings -- oh hi, front door of 221B Baker Street! Can't wait to knock on you again! -- and it delightfully allows many of your favourite British actors talk normal instead of having to fake being American by adding 500 additional "R"s to words like "daughter" and "murder."

I'm looking at you, Hugh Laurie. Quit trying to pull that shit off. YOU DON'T.

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