Ask Supernatural's Dead Good Ol' Boy Hunter Dude
Just because Bobby's dead doesn't mean he doesn't give good advice.
Do you have any helpful hints that will make unearthing dead bodies, chasing spirits, and doing taxes a sin against God any of the other days of the week? Asking for a friend.
Dammit, Rufus. We're both dead. Hell, you've been dead since Season 6. I poured Johnnie on your damn grave. Would you give it a rest already? Sweet Jesus. Stop messing with my afterlife.
Is it weird that I'm attracted to the Darkness? Or is it weirder that she seems to be attracted to me? We're both good-looking, so maybe it's not weird at all! I'm very conflicted about all this, but I think that if I don't take charge of this mess, it really will be the end of the world.
Yeah, I know it's you, Dean. Yeah, she will be the end of the world, especially if you keep turning into a big pile of goop every time she comes around. Sorta sucks to leave all the heavy lifting to Sam. I can relate to that. Anyway, keep working on this. I know you hate reading and would rather be at a strip club, but man up, kid. Still, if it doesn't work out, you know I'll see you on the other side someday. Just don't rush it.
I've been thinking about moving into an old house with lots of character, but it's been on the market for years and I think there were some murders in it. Should I get a psychic type to come in and burn some sage so I can buy it, or should I just get a condo?
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! That's a hoot. Get a damn condo, you idjit.
My bedroom is really cold and I hear footsteps at night when no one's nearby. Do you think my tendency to wear really long, dated flannel nightgowns is causing ghosts to be attracted to me?
Little Girl Blue
Now that you mention it, I think every little girl who has been spooked by the unded since the late 1800s has worn ridiculously girly flannel nightgowns. I say burn that getup and get a Disney princess jammie set. It can't hurt. That shit's ugly enough to scare off the undead, amiright?