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Supergirl's Jimmy Olsen Will Bankrupt Catco In Three Months

Daniel MacEachern is not a crackpot. He just thinks it's completely obvious that Snapper Carr is much more qualified to run Catco than Jimmy Olsen.

Such is the nature of comic-book fandom that to participate in the culture means occasionally you're going to think things like, "I can accept that Earth's yellow sun and lower gravity means people from another planet who still managed to wind up looking EXACTLY LIKE HUMANS can fly but also shoot heat beams from their eyes, but I do not believe for a second that Cat Grant would leave the art director in charge of her media empire."

But there is no goddamn way Cat Grant would leave the art director in charge of Catco. If she did, she'd choke on the cherry in her third Manhattan of the morning if she saw the way Sunshine Olsen here likes to brainstorm the headlines before they actually have news to go under those headlines. I'm not going to lie: This vein on the left side of my face started to throb.

Snapper Carr, whose hobbies include being rude and bald, takes charge of Jimmy's story meeting and starts assigning people angles to chase regarding today's visit of President Olivia Marsdin, in town to sign an Alien Amnesty Something. Carr's biggest mistake is being a dick to the person who is now technically his boss.

I'd say Carr is the only person who seems to understand they're actually a news organization, but he also waves around reporter copy on printed-off pieces of paper which either means he's Irascibly Old School or nobody involved with this show understands how news outlets -- yes, even ones with a print component -- work in the year of our Lord 2016.

And when Kara blithely submits an editorial masquerading as a news story -- about Lena Luthor's in-development alien identification device -- he correctly points out that her opinion is not needed. (Hilariously, he snaps that if he'd wanted her opinion, he'd have sent her to op-ed.) It's too bad Earth's yellow sun doesn't confer super-objectivity upon her, but at least she's more ethical than her cousin in his earliest comic books, where he'd shadily write stories about HIMSELF, while also using his super-speed to be able to do it before Lois Lane even had a chance to. Still, Carr is treated as the villain here, and Olsen asserts his authority not by immediately telling him to can the attitude (he does so, but later) but by apparently passive-aggressively chopping off the first paragraph of Carr's own piece (I guess the news editor is writing copy too? WHY NOT) and then waiting for Carr to bitch about it so Olsen can dress him down.

Faced with a superior who's willing to put his foot down, Carr relents, which means he will of course become a super-villain through an industrial accident or a radiation from a nuclear explosion.

And that's it! ...Oh, right: The Kryptonian who attacked Kara at the end of last episode turns out to not be the person who attacked Marsdin but is actually Mon-El, a person from a "sister planet," and Marsdin is played by Lynda Carter and she makes a joke about her jet that makes you think she's going to turn out to be Wonder Woman but instead she turns out to be a villain because shape-changing people on this show can't walk away from a group of people without visibly shape-changing their faces and looking menacing, like NOT EVEN AT THE DEO, an organization full-on devoted to hunting people like Marsdin. Oh, and J'ohn J'onzz meets a female Martian at a bar for aliens on earth who love Dolly Parton, something that that clearly unites us across the universe.

But that's all the superhero stuff, which really didn't detract too much from what we all tune in for every weekend: newsroom drama! That or the always-exciting jurisdictional battle between Alex and a detective who -- you're never going to believe this -- wind up working together!

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