Mitch Haaseth / ABC

Scandal Wonders What If?

Liv ponders what would have happened if she hadn't helped rig the election for Fitz. Her outcomes are not bad for everyone except Mellie.

Now that everyone knows about the shadowy syndicate behind the assassination of Frankie Vargas, Fitz, Jake, and Liv argue about how to handle it. Should they have the syndicate members killed? Do they even know all of the people involved? Maybe they should just do nothing, since it looks like Mellie is going to gain the White House and that's what they want? Fitz wants to clear Cyrus's name and put him in the White House, and he needs Jake and Liv's buy-in. Before they can come to a conclusion, Liv drifts off, wondering how all of their lives would be different if she hadn't helped rig the election for Fitz. So let's rank the differences, from least to most ridiculous:

1. Liv And Fitz Live Happily Ever After…Sort Of

Once Fitz loses the election, he divorces Mellie and comes for Liv. They get married in six months, which seems a little quick. And then Fitz gets a cable news show that he thinks celebrates his role as a statesman, but it's on Thursdays at 3 PM, so he's kind of small potatoes. Liv stops being attracted to him because he's out of power, which is kind of shitty? Fitz starts drinking more and and and. Eventually, Fitz realizes he's being a flabby douche and Liv realizes that she should support her husband emotionally instead of sniping at him from the sidelines and I guess they live happily ever after. This whole storyline felt like wish fulfillment for the Olitz fans who have missed seeing those two make out and also wanted to see their wedding.

2. Abby And David Rosen Are Together

Abby is working at an unspecified job and David Rosen is still the Attorney General. And they're together! And seem happy! And Abby's character hasn't been completely assassinated by the ludicrous Chief of Staff storyline.

3. Liv Is Working With Marcus On Criminal Justice Reform

Liv working with Marcus isn't THAT strange, because if she weren't working on a campaign, it makes sense that she would do something to make a difference. What doesn't make much sense is that Liv wouldn't have any connections in DC who would be interested in sponsoring a bill on criminal justice reform. Someone from a blue district somewhere would be more than happy to put his or her name on it, and with a Democratic President, it seems like a no-brainer. But Liv's whole alternate storyline relies on her not having enough juice to get a meeting with anyone important anymore, so we have to pretend like she'd be ineffective, when the Olivia Pope we know would get shit done regardless.

4. Quinn Is Still Lindsay, And She's On A Reality Show

This was actually my favorite alternate storyline, because it demonstrated that the writers think about as much of Quinn as I do. Anyway, in the alternate reality her name is still Lindsay, because no one got murdered or blown up, and she's a popular contestant on a Bachelor-like reality show who goes on to extend her fifteen minutes of fame as a guest on Fitz's show. And then she tries to seduce Fitz in his dressing room, but Fitz realizes that he's a sad old drunk and rejects her.

5. No One Has Held Huck Down And Shaved His Head

I refuse to believe that Liv would put up with Huck's gross, matted hair for more than a week. She hires him to work in her office, helping with computers. Fine. The writers once again seem to forget that there's a difference between unsocialized and mentally challenged with Huck, as usual. Given how impeccably Liv is generally turned out, does anyone believe that she would allow Huck to appear in her wedding photos with that hairstyle? And also, this is the best wig they could find? It looks like someone found it in a gutter and just plopped it on his head.

6. Cyrus And Mellie Are Married

Look, I know that even in this more enlightened day and age, sometimes gay men marry women for a variety of reasons. But the idea that Mellie would actually believe that Cyrus was in love with her, and that she would marry him? Then again, Cyrus does seem to continue to nail down really attractive significant others, and I don't get it. Also, it was ridiculous for Mellie to successfully run for President in the standard timeline, but at least she had six years as First Lady and maybe two years as Senator under her belt. In the alternate timeline, as far as we know, she was just the wife of a former governor. Mellie really got the shit end of the alternate timeline anyway: married to a gay man who is running her failing presidential campaign along with Eli Pope. At least she didn't have to have a third kid as a publicity stunt in this one.

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