Other Than Quantico, Where Can You Take Yoga With Blair Underwood?

And more not-quite-burning questions sparked by the latest episode!

Quantico picks back up where we left off last week, with Alex lurking around both the Farm and inside the so-called Crisis Zone. We learn little from either situation, save that CIA camp continues to be shady, spending governmental money on questionable necessities, like yoga mats and the super-nice trainee house that's conveniently located only a short jog away from Alex and Booth's decrepit love shack. Oh, and also: Miranda is apparently a bad guy, tipping off the terrorists about Alex being in the building (it remains unclear how she knows exactly which building Alex is in, or which building we're all supposed to be pretending is terrorist headquarters). We've been through the wringer enough times to know that all is never as it seems, but if this all stems from a Miranda/Blair Underwood Tinder Connection several decades ago, I'd be down with that. In the meantime, namaste in bed while Alex does all the impractical running around to clean up this mess.

How are Alex's heels not making noise on the marble floors of City Hall?

Are they magic? They must be magic, since modern science would otherwise dictate an extreme echo in an empty chamber, but hey -- girl's gotta get on the run somehow, so logic be damned. This practicality might be an even more egregious transgression then her perfect blowout, but at least now we have Harry calling her out for some of this impractical, only-on-TV stuff; let's just hope he makes it to next season to call out this specific offense.

Seriously, this is the CIA, yet no one is on to both Alex and Booth disappearing together for hours at a time?

I get that most of these people are in training, but you'd think that when they show up late to yoga class at the same time, there'd at least be a hookup joke, right? Or is this so obvious that maybe Blair Underwood's not calling attention to it is a red herring because he is actually totally on to it (and Miranda by extension -- does he turn her?)?

Speaking of yoga -- where can you sign up for classes with Blair Underwood?

Asking for a friend, who is really me.

Why on Earth would Shelby leave Alex a voicemail?

Voicemails are the worst on a normal day -- let's be honest, the chances of any of us actually listening to one are 50/50 at best -- so why does Shelby think Alex is just going to casually punch in her PIN while on the run from some terrorists, as though she has all the time in the world? I'd think a text would work best in a situation like this, but what do I know.

Is there really a secret NYPD tunnel under Federal Hall?

There could be? I do actually walk by that building a lot, and have always been suspicious of this one random gate on the side that seemingly leads to nowhere yet always has a K9, his human, and his car outside, so it's definitely possible, though logic would suggest that since it wasn't mentioned in National Treasure, it can't be real. There is an actual abandoned subway station underneath City Hall, but geographically, that's a 15-20-minute walk, and it doesn't matter anyway, because the hostages are apparently being held in some magical building that's all windowed and tall, which doesn't actual fit the profile of any of the old-school buildings that were called out by name when the G20 was first introduced via news clips in the premiere.

Who's Miranda's new boo, and do we trust him?

Miranda went through hell last season, with her kid's death and former lover's penchant for terrorism, so it's nice to see that she's been able to move on, both professionally and personally. But do we trust this new dude, Paul? He works for VP Haas, which is obviously a mark against him, and he seems more than gung-ho to militarize the situation without fully analyzing it, while also cutting down Miranda in the process. None of it is very cool.

Why is VP Haas on Air Force One?

Procedurally, this just doesn't make sense. Air Force One is the call sign, not the actual name of the plane, so even in the event that the VP took the plane usually known as Air Force One for a joyride, it would be referred to in flight as Air Force Two. Also: in the event of a terrorist attack on the scale of this one, the VP would most likely be transported to a bunker in the wilderness somewhere, rather than left to hang out mid-air, but this is Claire we're talking about, and it wouldn't be surprising to learn that she masterminded the whole situation while simultaneously sneaking Caleb's law school application into the accepted pile.

Can Harry please be a good guy?

He's just so goofy and dashing and British. Or, to put it another way: he's shown more charisma in two episodes than Ryan did all of last season. And he made Shelby in about the time it takes to tie a shoelace. Can we keep him? And maybe the hilarious residents of Williamsburg, too? At least those guys know how to lose a tail.

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