The Perfect Couple, Like Really Opposite
- Okay, you ready to look? This way you can get over it?
- I'm not touching it, 'cause you peed on it, so that's gross.
- Well, we'll go see the gyno and we'll see…what's wrong with you.
- Two lines in front of it! And the lines are very very very very line-y.
- Everybody waits three months.
We're not everybody.
- There's a reason to have sex! We should have sex again.
- I did not overreact. It's Whitney Houston!
- Is that dramatic or what? Look at this.
- This is one instance, Jeff, where I wasn't gonna curb it.
- Okay, well, you know, we all get hurt.
- Damn, Kim, you an animal.
- I can't stand those people out there.
- You really need to not tell any more people."
- You think you wanna tell a pregnant woman that?
- What, you gonna cry now?
- Okay, I'm getting upset. I am not doing this right now. This should be the happiest time of my life! I should be thrilled right now!
- I wanna know what you're gonna do, and how much it's gonna cost.
- The Disneyworld of furniture!
- Shopping has never been this much not fun.
- It looks like a burrito. Don't be a baby.
- I feel like once you live that life that you want to live for like a year, you're gonna be like, 'I'm effing bored.'"
- That is like a thousand-dollar shirt, you don't wear that to garden!
- I wanted you to finally see what I've been dealing with for the last 45 years.
- First of all, don't scream, it is going in the living room.
- You guys are the perfect couple, like really opposite. It's really cute.
- Well, it's by the beach, so, um…volleyball?
- There's the Hamburglar!
That's our gondolier.
- You fogged up my glasses.
- Why would you put eggs in brownies? I never tasted egg in a brownie before.
- I actually had to Google it on how to spell 'Valentine's Day.'
- My husband always said, 'You had Shamu potential' -- do you know what that means?
- I know why you're calling me. You're calling for an authorized purchase, aren't you.
- You're not putting any lingerie on, are you?
- I can't believe these balloons, I want to hug them!
- I'm not trying to spill it, I know what I'm doing!
- Oh, who's crabby now.
- Pull it back just a hair, the energy?
- I'm not stressed out, you're rude, and you're inconsiderate.
- I'm excited. Thanks for getting me out the Bronx.
- Can you rub my tummy, my mommy used to rub my tummy.
- But happy Valentine's Day in the event that I fall asleep by the time you get up.
- That was so romantical.
You're stealing my words.
- Get that away from me.
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