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Reason It's not earrings in that box.

Screens: AMC


Things get triply, and nipply, crazy when parties and work obsessions get out of hand.

  • Previously

    Don returned to work to find the age of computers had arrived; while visiting Megan in California, Don said she was acting crazy (to be fair, she kinda was); Pete chewed out Don for being impulsive, and Cutler chewed out Don for being an alcoholic fuck-up; the partners said Don could return to work, but he could not be alone with clients, had to stick to the script, and would report to Lou, who was like, "WHAT!? This is BULLSHIT!" So that's probably going to lead to some stuff.

  • And Now, A Word From Our Sponsor

    "Scout's Honor"

    "Beetle Bailey" too edgy for you and "Hagar the Horrible" too uncivilized? Why not try "Scout's Honor," a new sure-to-be-syndicated comic strip from seething cauldron of disapproval Lou Avery? It features a monkey, a plunger, and three strips of hilarity! But see, the joke is, the monkey is in the military and dressed like a soldier? I mean, what the heck is with that?! We have no idea, but we know it's funny because Stan found it in the copier and is going to have a field day talking shit about it until somebody gets fired, most likely.

  • Awkward

    Situation: As if being in the office with someone who hates his guts wasn't bad enough, Don has to share an elevator with his new semi-boss, Peggy. And she wants to talk about work.

    What makes it awkward? Peggy hates Don for making Ted go to California but is enjoying being his boss. Don probably wishes he'd never met Peggy.

    Who's feeling awkward about it? Mostly Don.

    How is order restored? Instead of saying something mean about Peggy's off-hours masturbating habits like Ginsberg did (and boy did the phrase "Handi-Wrap" give him an opening), Don shuts up and allows Peggy to have her moment.

  • Fight! Fight! Fight!

    Ginsberg Vs. The Hum Of Progress

    Ginsberg not only hates the humming of the new gigantic computer in the office, but apparently the happy humming of a woman tasked with working in the room with the machine. Peggy offers to introduce him to the new worker, but Ginsberg insists he doesn't want to meet her, because one by one, they'll all be taken over. Just because he's right doesn't mean he's not a little crazy, too.

    Winner: IBM, which hums on.

  • Phone Call

    Dick Gets A Call At Work

    Don receives a phone call from Stephanie Horton, Anna Draper's niece, who is now hippie-fied, very pregnant, and running out of money. She stresses it's not an emergency and Don doesn't sound put out that she called; it's maybe one of the few good things left in his life to hear from her. Don sends her to Megan's place and insists he wants to see her. She agrees. Don calls Megan to tell her what's up and that he'll be flying out, and she assents even though she's already planned a party for her actor friends since Don wasn't supposed to be around that weekend.

  • Snapshot

    You Know That Guy Lou? That's Lou In The Drawing.

    Stan takes the first of many shots at Lou's comic-strip aspirations with this drawing, in which Stan has helpfully labeled Lou as "Lou." Because that's his name and Stan didn't want anyone to get confused. Who's the shitty cartoonist now, Stan?

  • That Quote
    "She can handle the homework. I'll handle the silver."
    Betty, to Henry, speaking as sensitively as ever about her housekeeper Loretta
  • Bad Habits

    Distrusting Don/Dick/Whomever

    Living (barely) with Don Draper gives one occasion to question even the very nature of truth. But the one time Megan should believe Don is being sincere and not asking her to help take care of a young girl he might have slept with and knocked up is the time she unsurprisingly gets jealous and distrusts her instead of just taking Don and Stephanie at their word. But it's Don. Can you blame her?

  • Awkward

    Situation: A round of "Let's make fun of Lou's crap comic strip again!" turns serious when Lou emerges from a stall, having heard the whole thing. And to make matters worse, the rule of keeping an empty urinal between two peeing men (also known as the Splashback Law) is unobserved due to too few urinals.

    What makes it awkward? Lou has ears. And his newspaper-reading time has been interrupted by people who don't appreciate three strips of genius!

    Who's feeling awkward about it? Probably Lou, but he walks right out without a word.

    How is order restored? Lou will get his say. Oh, you just wait.

  • Meeting Time

    Lou Is Gonna Have It Out, Pinkos

    Who called the meeting? Lou.

    What's it about? It was supposed to be a Creative meeting, but instead turns into Lou defending his comic strip from smug assholes like Stan.

    How'd it go? Badly for all. Stan can't stop being jerky about the strip, and Lou takes it very badly, comparing his work to "Underdog," which was created by a former co-worker of his at his old agency; and to Bob Dylan's genius. Lou claims everyone lacks patriotism and loyalty, and this just makes things even worse; even Don can't resist cracking up at seeing a manager lose all control over his employees. Lou storms off, but not before telling everyone they're going to be working late, changing Don's plans to fly out to California.

  • That Quote
    "I'm not taking management advice from Don Draper."
  • Money Matters

    Hit The Road, Preggers

    Megan, already feeling weird about Don's pregnant "niece," cuts a phone conversation with him short just as Stephanie is getting out of the bath. What starts as a warm conversation about Anna and the ring she passed on gets awkward quickly when Megan says she doubts she'll have her own kids with Don, and when the subject of dating musicians comes up, Stephanie says she doesn't care if Don finds out because she knows all Don's secrets. That throws Megan into a tailspin of emotions, culminating in her running for the checkbook to help Stephanie out -- with the implied message that Stephanie should maybe take it and be on her way. Stephanie seems crushed and grateful at the same time, hearing the message loud and clear, saying she'll take off and clarifying that nothing ever happened between her and Don.

    Pregnant hippie removal = $1,000

  • That Quote
    "Leave the thinking to me!"
    Henry, who does not appreciate Betty having an opinion about the Vietnam War at a little party they hosted
  • Snapshot
    Screen: AMC

    Screen: AMC

  • Snapshot
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  • Alert!

    You Should See The Other Girl Who Hates Her Mother

    Alert Type: Broken-Nose Alert.

    Issue: Playful sword-fighting with golf clubs led Sally to get her nose broken and score some black eyes.

    Complicating Factors: Betty has a perfect nose she passed on to Sally, so you can see how this is a nightmare.

    Resolution: Sally and Betty fight over Sally's face while Henry tries to keep the peace. Betty threatens to break Sally's arm, Sally brings up abortion, and Sally gets sent to her room while Henry wonders if he might be able to push up the date of his death a few years.

    Spoiler: I always thought Betty had gotten a nose job at some point.

  • Party!

    Peggy Needs A New Place

    What's the occasion? What passes for a Saturday at Peggy's house is Ginsberg showing up and complaining that computers make men into "homos," and Julio from upstairs coming over to watch TV.

    What are the refreshments? Pretzels, no drinks.

    Whose embarrassing public scene will everyone be talking about tomorrow? That time after Julio left when Ginsberg decided to prove just how much of a "homo" he is not. It did not work out so well.

  • Party!

    Meanwhile, At The Other Party

    What's the occasion? Megan's actor friends need a place to smoke pot, play jazz, and act out sides or some shit.

    What are the refreshments? Lots of liquor, pot, and probably sex.

    Whose embarrassing public scene will everyone be talking about tomorrow? When Megan did her obligatory life-of-the-party dance and Don looked like someone was pulling out one of his lower intestines one inch at a time.


    Ugh, musicians.


    Oh no, party ruined!

  • That Quote
    "I have a stomachache all the time."
    Bobby Draper, saddest little boy
  • Hell No!

    Ginsberg Gone Wild

    Peggy wakes up to find a disheveled, horny Ginsberg next to her on the couch. Still insisting that the computer at work is humming and making him homosexual, Ginsberg reasons that he and Peggy have to have sex and reproduce right now. (Interesting that even in this moment, he feels he has to tell Peggy that he wishes there was some way to reproduce without having sex.) He gets on top of Peggy and starts kissing her. Peggy, of course, is disgusted with this craziness and pushes him off, then tells him to leave. Ginsberg regains enough of his senses to ask Peggy not to report the incident.

  • Meeting Time

    Harry Lets The Cat Out Of The Bag

    Who called the meeting? Don.

    What's it about? Don wanted to escape the party, and when Harry showed up with a girl who was not his wife, Don had his excuse to go out to a bar.

    How'd it go? Lying, lame, cheating Harry tries to make nice with Don, who suddenly has some information over him, but Don isn't much interested in that and seems to be looking for some information he can use at work. He gets that, and much more, when Harry reveals that Cutler and Lou are going after Philip Morris, which would definitely mean Don would be out of the agency based on his scorched-earth New York Times editorial about Big Tobacco. It's information Don can use.

  • Love, Hate & Everything In Between

    Mad Menáge, Or, Brought To You By Matthew Weiner's Wiener

    Don comes back from his bar date with Harry to find the party is over. Megan and her friend Amy want to have fun but Don is tired and wants to go to bed. So Amy shows up at his bedroom door with orders to tuck him in. Can you guess what happens next?

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  • Hell No!

    President Betty Draper Francis

    In a moment of spite against Henry, Betty considers a future in politics, and it's absolutely terrifying.

  • Here's An Idea

    Don't Cut Off Your Nipple

    Ginsberg shows up in Peggy's office, saying he's back to normal, for which Peggy is relieved. In fact, he brought her a present in a small box to show that he now has a release for all his crazy weirdness. I bet it's a nice little bracelet or a small locket or a --


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    Screen: MGM

    Screen: MGM

  • Wrap It Up

    Don interrupts a meeting with Philip Morris to let it be known that he has worked on both sides of the tobacco war, and that it would really piss other tobacco companies off if Don changed his tune and issued an apology to Philip Morris. It's a long shot, but the tobacco guys seem intrigued, while Cutler and Lou are super-pissed.


    Poor Ginsberg is led away and Stan, not so smug now, offers to go with him.


    Now Peggy hates the computer.


    Computer does not care or feel. Busy making everyone gay.


    Don puts Lou and Cutler in a cab and whistles for one of his own. Is that swagger he's got back or just desperation?

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