Patrick Wymore / The CW

Let's Give Jane The Virgin An Assist In The Dating Game!

Jane hates the game, but must she hate the players? We're swiping right on some potential future dates for her.

Poor Jane: it's hard out there for a lady with a baby, papers to grade, and a bout of writer's block. This week, Jane adds one more project to her already busy schedule as she plunges into the wide world of casual dating, or at least dating men who are neither the longtime fiancé who recently spurned her NOR her accidental baby daddy who's currently making nice with the ex-wife who used his last remaining sperm sample to impregnate herself without his consent. Which, really, seems like a healthy kind of progress.

In the process of trying to live a normal life, Jane meets a dude at the laptop store, kisses a boy at the skate park (who turns out to be a creep, and Lina is fired for not intervening at the words "skate park"), notes the difficulties of dating while juggling an infant and grad school, and declares herself a "relationship person." This is probably true, but it feels a bit premature: even Alba won't let Jane give up on dating so easily. Can't the world of single men remain open to Jane Gloriana Villanueva? The guest-star options are endless! Let's consider:

New Line

New Line

Michael B. Jordan

As Fernando P. Hatch, a charming dolphin trainer Jane meets online. Her mental Polaroid shows her and Mateo with VIP splash-zone seating for life. Ultimately, saying he's a dolphin trainer gets him plenty of online action, and Jane can't keep up. She realizes later that he always smelled slightly of fish, but his smile somehow made up for it.

CBS

CBS

Joe Manganiello

...Is that not him already, as Professor Chavez, from the sweep-everything-off-the-desk sex dream? Oh. Hmmm. That's awkward.

HBO

HBO

Sam Claflin

As Pedro Milàn, the scientific advisor on Pasión Intergalactica. Rogelio sets him up with Jane, and they spend an evening discussing the trials of genre publishing. Things fall apart when he second-guesses Rogelio's newest idea for the show; he's mysteriously never seen again on that set, or anyone else's.

CBS Films

CBS Films

Oscar Isaac

As Angel Guerrero, a music mogul Lina sets her up with. They have drinks at the Marbella; she likes that he has his pilot's license, and it doesn't hurt that Rafael sees them together, but she imagines the way Xo would look at him and breaks it off out of compassion for Rogelio's ego.

Fox

Fox

Darren Criss

As Alejandro Bona, a sensitive singer-songwriter Jane meets at an open-mic night with her MFA classmates. He sings beautiful lullabies to Mateo, but he's lactose-intolerant and confuses Isabel Allende with Isabella Rossellini; he also ends up being a distant Solano cousin and a minor henchman in Sin Rostro's gang, so, you know, that's probably never going to work.

BBC

BBC

Lionsgate

Lionsgate

Liam Hemsworth

As Tyler Smoke, whom Jane agrees to date without even reading his online profile; he's just that hot. After, she can't remember a single thing about him. Lina later hooks up with him and also immediately forgets that they ever met.

Matthew Lewis

As Marcus Tenterhook, the new tennis pro at the Marbella (also a Lina setup). His accent makes all three Villanueva ladies weak in the knees, but his delicate system can't handle Alba's cooking, and her relationship with Jane is cut short. During their brief time together, he gets hooked on Pasión Intergalactica and forms a long-term penpal relationship with Rogelio. Jane doesn't know.

Universal

Universal

Zach Gilford

As Justin Carruthers, a single dad she meets at the park, not that his backstory or situation matter because as soon as they meet him, everybody promptly forgets about the hotelier with a too-tight shirt and the overprotective cop with a thing for Christmas decorations. Gilford in any form takes the Jane universe by storm and fulfills Jane's to-date list without breaking a sweat. He charms Alba and Xo, bonds with Rogelio (but in a nice, normal way), and loves Mateo as his own. The show breaks format, Rafael and Michael both end up with other people, and everybody is happy. The End.

Almost all readers liked this episode
What did you think?