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Reason Netflix released the whole season the same day.

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The Fullest Fuller House Is Also The Spookiest

It’s Halloween in S02.E04, so let’s just throw out all time and logic!

To be enjoyed, every show requires a certain suspension of belief. (Of course there's no way anyone can afford that apartment in Friends, for example, but we just go with it.) However, sometimes a show forces me to suspend belief so much that it starts to make my brain stem hurt. This episode of Fuller House may shut down my entire central nervous system.



The episode opens with DJ sewing her children's matching Halloween costumes. Fine. From there, the episode practically reaches Westworld levels of outlandish plot developments. Max sashays in to proclaim that, according to his friend's blog, their $4 million home is the lamest one in the neighborhood. That a sassy seven-year-old would have an equally sassy friend who makes grand statements about the quality of million-dollar homes in the heart of the Bay Area totally checks out. That he has a blog, in 2016, makes no sense. This kid might have a well-followed Snapchat story. But a blog? No one reads opinions anymore except in a Twitter thread dotted with the handclap emoji.

Jimmy Gibbler surprised Stephanie with the most romantic Halloween date plan of all time: jobs! He's somehow lined them up jobs working as zombies at a local haunted house for one night only. Those things have auditions: I should know because I never got a call back from the one in Austin. I guess they couldn't have an overweight zombie with a lisp. Anyway: Stephanie -- who spends all day reading magazines -- is totally on board. 



The only storyline that actually is cohesive (and really cute) is Kimmy and Fernando. While Fernando, as a character, can sometimes be PROBLEMATIC, their decision to go in a group costume as Lucy and Ricky is (a) totally in character for the both of them, and (b) pays off in a cute, musical reference to I Love Lucy. Andrea Barber as Kimmy does sometimes come right up to the line of grating, but there were times in the episode that completely read as Lucielle Ball to me. Kudos! Now back to the nonsense.



DJ decides to seek revenge on the child that besmirched her good name by throwing the spookiest Halloween party. And even though this blog is revered throughout the greater San Francisco area, people show up! Nothing is remotely scary, of course, because kids are not impressed by grapes in a cauldron and fake limbs. DJ, who lives in a three-story home in the most expensive city in the country -- and who is a highly successful veterinarian who owns her own practice -- feels defeated. Thankfully, Jimmy and Stephanie come to the rescue!



Jackson and Ramona skip out on the Fuller Halloween party, probably due to the undeniable influence of the blog, and instead go to the haunted house where Jimmy and Stephanie are working...

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Netflix

...and where Jimmy and Stephanie scare the crap out of them. They all end up back at the Halloween party, where DJ hatches a plan to seek her vengeance on the child who spoke ill of her.

At this point, the episode makes absolutely zero sense and turns into an episode of Twin Peaks

? Jimmy arranges for the workers at the haunted house to come hide in the bushes and pop out to scare the blogger. Who, then, is working at the haunted house now? How did they coordinate this so quickly? Where are theses children's parents? What time is it, because at the beginning of the party it was already dark. Why is DJ so hellbent on proving this kid wrong? WHO READS BLOGS?



The plan works: everyone is scared, and now the blogger kid will probably never come to that house again because the adult woman who owns it clearly hates him.

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Netflix

The story ends with a Fuller group costume photo op, which finally snaps the show back to reality. As silly as it gets sometimes, Fuller House is, at its heart, full of love. The widowed mother and her three children together on a holiday just smiling for a picture really is sweet. And actually makes perfect sense.

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