Photo: Chris Large / FX

Who's Going To Make It Out Of Fargo Alive?

Iron-clad predictions (read: totally speculative, bet-hedging guesses) about the season finale body count.

The next time we reconvene in this space, Fargo's first (maybe only?) season will be over, and we will know whether justice has been meted out, and how. Naturally, now is the time for rank speculation about what might happen to the characters who've managed to stay alive this long, so let's get to it.

Molly

Assuming that the original film has supplied not just a title and setting but also its moral orientation, the only way this can end is with Molly being proven right in her suspicion of collusion between Lester and Lorne, so she has to live in order to bring one or both of them to justice. Plus, it would have been bad enough if the only decent cop in the tri-state area were to be killed in the line of duty; though I wouldn't necessarily put it past Lester to kill Molly if he thought doing so would buy himself five more minutes on earth -- he did, after all, just knowingly arrange the murder of his own wife -- I don't think America wants this story to end with the nice police officer whose life of loneliness just ended in a happy marriage getting murdered by a little weasel like Lester, particularly not now that she's pregnant.

Percentage Chance Of Survival: 100%

Mr. Wrench

Fargo's "Deaf fella" didn't just live through a brutal shootout: he received a visit from his former target informing him that the door was open for Mr. Wrench's retaliation. Though Lorne handicapped Mr. Wrench (pun somewhat intended) by killing his hearing partner and thus leaving Mr. Wrench vulnerable to attack by a stealthy assailant, I think we'd all like to see Lorne's rampage decisively end at the hands of an opponent Lorne has underestimated (and who is so dreamy, also).

Percentage Chance Of Survival: 80%

Lester

Lester is a complete scumbag for whom death might be too good an end...which is why I think the show will keep him alive to face the consequences of all his venal actions. Though if it goes the other way, I think we'll all be okay with that. Fucking Lester.

Percentage Chance Of Survival: 60%

Lou

Not even I am so crazy as to say that Lou deserves death for the crime of allowing cherry pie to be disparaged at his place of work OR AM I? I'm not. I don't want Lou to get killed...but I can imagine a scenario where Lou becomes collateral damage, and the idea of avenging his death causes Molly to react to a situation where she could either kill or merely apprehend the responsible party by going with the lethal option.

Percentage Chance Of Survival: 50%

Pepper & Budge

We haven't gotten to know Agents Pepper and Budge very well, but we know it's because of their faith in Molly's theory of the crime that Bill Oswalt is even allowing her to continue pursuing it. It would be a tragic irony if they were to be killed investigating the case they're championing...but Jordan Peele and Keegan-Michael Key would probably also make it pretty funny.

Percentage Chance Of Survival: 40%

Bill Oswalt

If Bill Oswalt were to be reckless in pursuit of a tip in this case because he doesn't credit Molly's hunch and ends up dead for his troubles...well, it wouldn't be as ironic as if Pepper and Budge were to be killed in the same way, but it would be an effective J. Walter Weatherman lesson for him to learn: And That's Why You Believe Your Deputy.

Percentage Chance Of Survival: 35%

Lorne

Getting arrested and standing trial wouldn't be any kind of punishment for Lorne: he's past any possibility of remorse or grief, and if he went to prison, he'd just end up running the place inside of a day. The only way to stop Lorne, clearly, is to end his life, and the only way he could escape such a fate is if that "Garden of Eden" line in the latest episode wasn't a joke but a specific reference to his supernaturally evil powers. And I'm not ruling that out.

Percentage Chance Of Survival: 5%

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