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Donna Makes Style Choices She'll Have To Defend To Her Creator One Day In Our Latest Beverly Hills, 90210

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Listen along with the Again With This podcast on "Girls On The Side" -- maybe with a tranquilizer, if someone's kind enough to offer you one.

This is a marriage firing on all cylinders and pecking on all four lips. (Sorry, we should have warned you not to look at this filth if there were impressionable children in the room.)

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We might make the same face as Ray if we came home from weeks on the road and our girlfriend was walking around with croissant hair.

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But at least Ray is a pro at playing it cool when he's around his scandalous ex!

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LuAnn, look in the mirror and take one thing off. Maybe the cig.

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Donna, on the other hand, must have a three-part folding mirror at home to ensure that she looks awful from every angle. ...And also maybe a mirror on the ceiling.

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PSA: don't be the drunk old broad at the bar having an underage owner gesture to cut you off.

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DEFINITELY don't be the drunk old broad who reacts to getting cut off with a level of alarm comparable to startling a home invader.

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Here, the apogee of the bartender's disapproving look -- one Sarah claims she has been on the receiving end of many times. (hee.)

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Donna sure looks smug for someone who looks like a marshmallow that fell on a red M&M.

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TFW you run into the friend the drunk old broad just told you is totally dating a cheating scumbag.

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Looking good, no one!

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This is a degenerate alcoholic hung over the morning after? Tara's skin doesn't look that good after a day at the spa.

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The hair is great. The outgoing answering machine announcing Ray's return to the Peach Pit After Dark is so-so. The lettuce-edged baby T is...the '90s.

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Clare: exactly.

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Donna lies out to tan her chest butt crack...and then there's Maude.

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Here's that close-up on Donna's chest butt crack you didn't ask for!

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Not UPS Driver just needs your Jane Hancock!

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Oh good, a relic of the past for Kelly to be mournful about...

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...and stalk off so that Brandon will follow and comfort her. Yeah, okay, her burns -- but can't she just focus on how much better her hair looks?

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When she's not curling it like a soccer mom and pairing it with a frumpy greige sister-wife dress, that is.

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Remember when you used to run out to the newsstand to get the latest issue of Bambino?

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Exclusive photo of Tara and Sarah watching this storyline.

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Did Brandon go to a conference, or is he holding a conference in his suit pants?

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Brandon's finding it hard to focus on Kelly's problems what with the jingling of his arm party.

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No one has any patience for Kelly's loud "please ask what's wrong with me" sighing -- not even Lamb Chop over here.

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It's too bad you suffered horrific burns all over your body, but you're still a woman, so get that eyeliner on.

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Tonight: A Hero Removes Her Tube Sock With A Thumb Hole In It.

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And just as surely as eating a burger proved Kelly was over her eating disorder, exposing her neck and midriff prove she's over her burn-related self-consciousness.

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