Stephanie Green

Frozen yogurt devotee and compulsive knitter Stephanie Green recently left a career in the law to become a writer. Now she writes novels and blogs at StephanieEarlyGreen.com. Her work has been published in Narrative Magazine, and she has blogged about weddings, health, fitness, and beauty for The Washingtonian and Broke Girl's Guide. She's based in Washington, DC.

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Doesn’t Want A ‘Disingenuine’ Man!

Rachel puts the men through their underwhelming paces, and many bad attempts spelling and freestyle rapping ensue! 2017.06.20S13.E04

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Strips The Men Of Their Non-Existent Dignity!

Rachel continues her arduous journey to find love with stripping, mud wrestling, and, mercifully, no whaboom-ing! 2017.06.06S13.E03

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Must Choose Between Love & Basketball

Rachel Lindsay literally gets dunked on…but returns the favor with authority. 2017.05.30S13.E02

Whine & Roses: Whaboom Goes The Dynamite on The Bachelorette!

Rachel Lindsay submits herself to Bachelorettehood, with mixed (but mostly absurdly bad) results! 2017.05.23S13.E01

Would Married At First Sight's Sonia Be Better Off Divorced Than Married To A Guy With Nick's Terrible Taste In Bracelets?

What are Nick and Sonia fighting for, anyway? And other questions sparked by 'To Love And To Cherish'! 2016.10.05S04.E11

Bachelor In Paradise Takes Several Knees In The Season Finale

Some of the remaining couples end up engaged! But who were this season's ultimate winners and losers? 2016.09.06S03.E11

Just Like A Tattoo, We'll Always Have Bachelor In Paradise!

Some people make good decisions (like leaving) and others make less-good decisions (like getting matching tattoos). Who ranked the best this week? 2016.09.06S03.E10

Turds Learn To Surf On Bachelor In Paradise!

The contestants surf, cry, and scheme! Who ranks worst? 2016.08.30S03.E09

Ashley Finally Moves On (To An Even More Elevated Plane of Crazy) On Bachelor In Paradise

Just when Jared thinks he has slipped the Ashley I. yoke, she comes roaring back with more mayhem. How did all the other players rank this week? 2016.08.29S03.E08

On Bachelor In Paradise, Ashley I. Releases The Metaphorical, Backstabbing Kraken

Ashley I. tries her darnedest to get Jared to dump Caila, while other contestants variously sweat it out in a 'rebirth' ceremony, make out in the rain, and tearfully storm off camera. Who fares the worst in the week's second episode? 2016.08.23S03.E07

Bachelor In Paradise Takes Its Booze On A Cruise And Things Get Pretty Gross

Things devolve even further in paradise when several cast members take to the open seas. Who ranked the best and worst this week? 2016.08.23S03.E06

Bachelor In Paradise Lets Its Ashley I. Flag Fly (Again)!

Ashley is back, and she's sobbier than ever. Who ranked the best and the worst in the week's second episode? 2016.08.16S03.E05

Bachelor In Paradise Finally Unites The Two Most Boring Individuals On Television For A Stultifying Romance!

Jared and Caila fall in 'love,' while others just get drunk. How did the contestants rank this week? 2016.08.16S03.E04

Bachelor In Paradise Is Chad To The Bone!

We're ranking the players in Paradise! Spoiler: EVERYONE IS TERRIBLE. 2016.08.02S03.E01

The Bachelorette Says 'Phuket' And Picks A Guy!

JoJo gets her man, FINALLY. Can we all go home now? 2016.08.01S12.E11

The Bachelorette's Men Tell All (Now, With More Chad!)

CHAD IS BACK AND THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS RIGHT NOW. 2016.07.26S12.E10

The Bachelorette Thais Her Wagon To Two Boring Stars!

JoJo brings her dudes to Thailand for zero Thai stuff, but plenty of overnight action. 2016.07.26S12.E09

The Bachelorette Visited Aaron Rodgers's Hometown, And All She Got Was This Stupid Brother

JoJo is visiting the remaining four guys' hometowns and ranking them by worthiness of their families. Who will prevail? 2016.07.18S12.E08

The Bachelorette Almost Engages In Sexual Inter-Horse!

JoJo and the men bond with a lovely horse, drink grape-foot juice, and pig out on fries. 2016.07.11S12.E07

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