Jeff Drake

Jeff Drake has written things you might have seen on TV. Remember that ad campaign for Joey? Or that time Tina Fey made a joke in an SNL promo about having an alien baby? Nope? Ah well, those are things Jeff wrote. He’s also written for McSweeneys.net and currently contributes to the Wits radio show.

It's A Very Special Episode Of Paradise, And We've All Learned So Much!

A wedding, a lecture, and some failed attempts at romance: Paradise has it all! 2017.08.16S04.E02

Bachelor In Paradise Lost...And Found!

Paradise is back, now with more stoopid! 2017.08.15S04.E01

Rachel's Getting Married (Except Not Really Because Come On, That's Never Going To Happen)!

Rachel picks Bryan, as we always knew she would, and is blissfully "happy" about it. 2017.08.08S13.E11

Whine & Roses: Rachel's Men Tell Most!

The men discuss their time on the season and finally solve racism. 2017.08.01S13.E10

Whine & Roses: It's No Spain, No Gain For The Bachelorette!

Rachel makes her family meet the men and then jets off to Rioja to cavort with her final three. 2017.07.25S13.E09

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Meets The (Weird, Hostile) Parents On Hometown Week!

Rachel heads home(town) with her remaining four men, with mixed results. Who will she eliminate based on their terrible family? 2017.07.18S13.E08

Whine & Roses: Will The Bachelorette Remain Neutral In Switzerland?

Rachel and the dudes check out Geneva, where they try on watches and attend Mass. EXCITING! 2017.07.11S13.E07

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Is Liking Her Vikings!

Rachel and her suitors continue their Scandy adventure with Viking games, boat tours, and elderly Swedes! 2017.06.28S13.E06

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Doesn't Want To Take Things (O)slo(w)!

Rachel and the men jet off to Norway for rappelling, hand-ball, and hot-tubbing! Also: drama brews between Kenny and Lee, culminating in a dreaded two-on-one date. 2017.06.27S13.E05

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Doesn’t Want A 'Disingenuine' Man!

Rachel puts the men through their underwhelming paces, and many bad attempts spelling and freestyle rapping ensue! 2017.06.20S13.E04

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Strips The Men Of Their Non-Existent Dignity!

Rachel continues her arduous journey to find love with stripping, mud wrestling, and, mercifully, no whaboom-ing! 2017.06.06S13.E03

Whine & Roses: The Bachelorette Must Choose Between Love & Basketball

Rachel Lindsay literally gets dunked on…but returns the favor with authority. 2017.05.30S13.E02

Whine & Roses: Whaboom Goes The Dynamite on The Bachelorette!

Rachel Lindsay submits herself to Bachelorettehood, with mixed (but mostly absurdly bad) results! 2017.05.23S13.E01

The Bachelor Puts The Season On Ice

And by that, we mean...hooray, he finally chose a (potential) wife! 2017.03.14S21.E11

The Bachelor Leaves A Lady In Lapland

But which one? I'm sure none of us has ANY idea. And then the Women Tell All. 2017.03.07S21.E10

Top Chef Chooses Its Champion

On the finale of the show's best season yet, Shirley and Brooke go head-to-head one last time. 2017.03.03S14.E14

The Bachelor And The Bachelorette: The Sequel

Before Nick decides on his final three, Andi Dorfman visits for no good reason at all. 2017.02.28S21.E09

This Top Chef Episode Is All Mayan

The final three cook a Maya-inspired dish, using only Maya-appropriate cooking tools. 2017.02.24S14.E13

The Bachelor Breaks Out The Cheese Guns

The hometown dates fill Nick's calendar with fun activities like mudding, shopping, and church! 2017.02.21S21.E08

Top Chef Goes To Mexico

In Guadalajara, the final three become four, drink a ton of tequila, then become three again. 2017.02.17S14.E12

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