Jeff Drake

Jeff Drake has written things you might have seen on TV. Remember that ad campaign for Joey? Or that time Tina Fey made a joke in an SNL promo about having an alien baby? Nope? Ah well, those are things Jeff wrote. He’s also written for McSweeneys.net and currently contributes to the Wits radio show.

Bachelor's Back, All Right!

Some ladies dance with the Backstreet Boys, some do track and field, and one very special lady vomits in a bag. 2017.01.17S21.E03

Meet The Young Pope, Not The Same As The Old Pope

Buckle up, Catholics! There's a new Pope in town! 2017.01.13S01.E01

Top Chef Puts The 'Arrrr' In 'Charleston'

A pirate party produces slimy scallops, and one chef's exit is written in the stars! 2017.01.13S14.E07

The Bachelor Gets Married!

Seems like maybe Nick cut to the chase and married half the women. Oh, if only that were true! 2017.01.10S21.E02

Can The Top Chef Chefs Cook Better Than Edna?

The chefs pay tribute to revered Southern chef Edna Lewis, and get a blessing from the Surgeon General. 2017.01.06S14.E06

Did The Bachelor Just Jump The Shark?

The new season begins with 29 well-dressed ladies, and one who never takes off her shark costume. 2017.01.03S21.E01

Top Chef Pigs Out

A barbecue challenge produces a herniated disc, funky beans, and Hootie? 2016.12.30S14.E04

Top Chef Gets Trashy

You've heard of the seven deadly sins? Meet the seven deadly trash fish. Can the chefs find Jim-dandy ways to serve up the garbage of the sea? 2016.12.23S14.E04

Mise En Down The Road With Top Chef

Who wouldn't want to eat fourteen variations on radishes? 2016.12.16S14.E03

Top Chef Gets Down To Biscuits

The chefs get a crash course in Lowcountry and Gullah cooking. 2016.12.09S14.E02

Top Chef Puts Charleston In Charge

It's veterans versus newbies as the show kicks off a new season in South Carolina. 2016.12.01S14.E01

Finding Prince Charming Dines Family-Style

Will all of the suitors impress Robert's mostly boring family? Or will someone end up in the Friend Zone? 2016.10.28S01.E07

Game Of Thrones's Red Woman Weighs In On Dove Chocolate's New Commercial

Has Dove Chocolate's latest ad campaign gone too far? One witch says yes! 2016.08.25

Good Grief, MORE Game Of Thrones Spinoff Ideas!

Because the Seven Kingdoms have so many more stories to tell. 2016.08.10

At Least One Bachelor In Paradise Deserves Love!

Many deserve other punishments, but which of them is the worst after this episode? 2016.08.10S03.E03

Bachelor In Paradise Continues Its Tequila-Propelled Journey Toward Love!

Who will be the most horrible player now that Chad is gone? 2016.08.09S03.E02

When Game Of Thrones Ends, Which Spinoff Series Should Keep Us In Westeros?

We offer HBO some free advice on squeezing every last drop of spinoff juice from its most valuable property. 2016.08.08

Star Trek Faces Bones In The Ultimate Bones-off!

TOS's McCoy battles Bones's Brennan to determine which doctor best deserves their shared nickname. 2016.07.29

EHG Mini: Go Affleck Yourself

Putting Any Given Wednesday guest Ben Affleck's pottymouth to work on other unscripted series. 2016.07.04

The Crew On Roadies Runs Into Health Problems (Among Other Kinds Of Problems)

But are any of these 'dramatic conflicts' even worth caring about? 2016.07.03S01.E02