Eric's Afternoon Continues Going Off The Rails On 24: Legacy

All aboard!

Eric's fraught escape from the police station is brought to an abrupt resolution by a well-timed deus ex machina. Fortunately, CTU's new boss Keith Mullins was convinced in record time that Rebecca tased him and tied him up good faith. So now everyone is on the same page, and Eric is allowed to walk out of the police station as a kind of adjunct CTU agent with two million bucks in his possession.

So now it's just a matter of swapping the money to get the flash drive containing the sleeper cell info back from Ben, and then Eric can call it a day. Or so he thinks, because remember how Ben took one of the dead terrorists' phones at the bottom of the first hour so he could try selling the list to them in case Eric didn't come through? Apparently it never occurred to anyone that the terrorists could use that phone to track Ben. Except that obviously it occurred to the terrorists, who show up just in time to steal the list back amid all manner of running and shooting in public. Which they successfully do. Nice going, good guys.

In fact, only the terrorist leader seems to be having a successful hour. Nicole helplessly watches her ex-boyfriend and current brother-in-law drive off into a trap set by the woman who's supposedly in charge of her safety; the individual behind the leak that started all this suffers a crisis of conscience about pointing the finger of guilt at someone else; and would-be high-school terrorist Amira and her chemistry teacher experience their most hilarious setback yet.

But despite all this, there's surprisingly little going on. Is it enough to make this episode even one-half 24: Legac-ious? Only one way to find out.

24-y Element Present?
The Heroes Play By Their Own Rules
Trapped in the evidence locker at the precinct, Eric removes the bomb he'd attached to one of his cop hostages, and blows a hole through an internal wall to escape. So much for my theory that he'd wired up a dud. But despite the assault and kidnapping of police officers, theft, and property damage, it all works out okay. As for Rebecca: she makes it to her husband's campaign fundraiser after all, but only to detain and interrogate his campaign manager. If Donovan gets elected, the White House staff will be terrified of her.

Somebody Gets Tortured
Just Eric and Ben and their shared tortured past.
What's Not In That Bag?
In addition to the backpack, Eric's now also loaded down with a duffel bag containing the two million dollars that Ben's extorting in exchange for the sleeper list. Google tells me that much cash weighs about 44 pounds. Someone in Eric's physical condition is certainly capable of schlepping that around, but for that kind of money, it's worth investing in a nice, sturdy roller bag.
Plot Ripped From The Headlines
Only if I've been reading the wrong headlines.
Plot Ripped From The Headlines…Of Nutty Conspiracy Sites
Well, it seems Eric's team wasn't betrayed by Senator Donovan's Arab-American campaign manager, but by his Irish-American dad! Who then framed Nilaa for it. To be sure, there was once a time when the Irish were also viewed with widespread nativist antipathy in the U.S., but that was long before websites. Leaflets and yellow newspapers don't count.
Now that new boss Keith Mullins has been cleared, CTU is a big, functional, welcoming family again. Yes, Andy and the mean-looking Field Ops boss, an Agent Thomas Locke, are getting over a breakup, but sometimes CTU relationships come to an end without one of the parties turning out to be evil. I'll list some examples as soon as I think of them.
Well Then, Why Did That Happen Before?
You may remember how Andy tried to say something conciliatory to Locke in the previous hour, and Locke shut him down. Now their roles are reversed. Their relationship must have been a roller coaster.
Double-Digit Body Count
Only if you count the minus sign as a digit. Everyone thought the chemistry teacher had fatally brained Drew during the last hour. But while they were distracted for five seconds, dude got up and ran away! So unless someone got killed in the Metro station shootout without our seeing it, this hour's body count is negative one. Unfortunately for Drew, he again collapsed into unconsciousness and is now in an ambulance with his terrorist ex-girlfriend, who is highly motivated to keep him quiet. Which means he's shaping up to become this season's Janet York.
Chicks, Maaaaan
Maybe the female characters aren't as bad as we were led to think last hour. Nilaa, for example, seems to have been framed for accessing the intel on Eric's team. And Aisha did hesitate before sending Isaac off to his death at the hands of his counterpart, Royo. But she lets her evil plan proceed. And who knows what manner of mischief Amira will get up to in the back of that ambulance with the long-suffering Drew? At least Nicole is becoming a more active participant in the proceedings, as she tries to take steps to protect Isaac. Not that she succeeds, but still.
Life Is A First-Person Shooter
This episode is bookended by chases. The first is at the beginning when Eric and his implausibly helpful cop hostage try to escape the precinct. And the second is the one through the Metro station when the terrorists show up to recover their flash drive. Between all the hallways and tunnels, it's more like a maze-runner kind of situation.
There's Nuffin Like A MacGuffin
The terrorists get away with the flash drive, so it seems unlikely that Ben will be allowed to hold onto his 44 pounds of cash now.
Cliffhanger Twist!
Again, there's no last-second shock to make us glad we stuck around to the bitter end. Make it worth our while to stick around to the final clock, already.
6 / 12
Final Score
24: Legacy
An elevator pitch for the movie Ransom but with a computer file in place of the child
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